(STILLWATER) – The
news lately seems to be splashed with stories of disaster. With all this
coverage it is important to talk to your children about these recent tragedies.
While the coverage
can be overwhelming for adults, it can be especially confusing and frightening
for younger children, said Debbie Richardson, Oklahoma State University
Cooperative Extension Service assistant parenting specialist.
ÒChildren respond
to trauma in different ways. Some may respond soon after the event and others
may seem to be doing fine for weeks, even months, but begin to show troublesome
behavior,Ó she said. ÒIt is important to know the signs that are common at
different stages so you can identify problems and react appropriately.Ó
Parents can use
the news of disasters as an opportunity to talk and listen to their children,
recommend psychologists who work in trauma and recovery.
Richardson said it
is important to be honest. Parents should acknowledge to children that bad
things do happen, but at the same time reassure them that many people,
including parents, teachers and local police, are working to keep them safe.
ÒYoung children
may show their feelings through play or drawings,Ó she said. ÒElementary age
children will express themselves with a combination of play and talking,
whereas adolescents are more likely to have the skills to communicate their
feelings verbally.Ó
Adults should be
in tune to a childÕs concerns, but also try to help the children put their
feelings into proportion with the real risk.
Richardson
suggests limiting exposure to news coverage.
ÒParents should
monitor how much exposure a child has to news reports of traumatic events,
including the recent school shootings,Ó she said. ÒResearch shows some children
believe the events are reoccurring each time they see the television footage.Ó
Richardson noted
to keep in mind most children are resilient and will return to normal
activities and personality fairly quickly, yet parents should be attentive to
any signs of anxiety that indicate their child may need additional support.
Some changes could
show in a childÕs school performance, relationships with peers and teachers,
worry, sleeplessness, refusal to go to school, nightmares, headaches,
stomachaches, or loss of interest in activities they once enjoyed.
Following are 10
tips for parents to consider when talking to their children after a disaster.
1.
Provide children the opportunity to talk about what they are seeing on television
and to ask questions.
2.
Do not be afraid to admit you do not have an answer to all their questions.
3.
Answer questions on the childÕs level.
4.
Provide ongoing opportunities for children to talk. Most likely they will have
additional questions as time goes on.
5.
Use this time as an opportunity to establish a family emergency plan. Having
the feeling that there is something you can do may be comforting to both
parents and children.
6.
Allow children to discuss other fears and concerns about unrelated issues. This
is a good time to investigate these topics.
7.
Monitor the childrenÕs television watching.
8.
Help children understand there are no bad feelings and that a wide array of
reactions is normal.
9.
Try not to focus on blame.
10. Try to
identify good things, such as heroic actions, families who are grateful for
being reunited and the assistance offered by people around the country and the
world.
For more
information about talking to children about disasters or other Extension
programs, contact your local county Extension office.
Prepared by:
Debbie
Richardson
Parenting
Assistant Specialist
Cooperative
Extension Services
233
HES/HDFS
Stillwater,
OK 74078
405-744-6231
debbie.richardson@okstate.edu
And
Katie
L. Reim
Communication Specialist
OSU Agricultural Communication Services
140 Printing Services Building
Stillwater, Ok 74078
(405) 744-6792
katie.reim@okstate.edu